I have always been a planner.
I like to plan what I’m eating for each meal, I like to plan my weekends (a good 5 days ahead), I like to plan what time I’ll be in bed. I just like to have a plan!
Since becoming a parent, planning has become super interesting. Plans become EXTRA important in many ways.
We have to plan ahead and pack 100 diapers… just in case our kids randomly decide to poop up their backs. Hand in hand with that, we need to make sure we have an extra outfit in case they do, have an extra layer in case it gets cold, extra socks, cooler clothes, pjs… just in case!
We need to plan a time when we absolutely have to start getting everyone ready so that we’re only a few minutes late, and not an hour late. We need to plan waaaaaay ahead of time if we want to do anything without our kids, because we need someone to commit to watching them.
There’s a whole lot of planning going on here!
Today I planned on taking my daughter to a play date at our church. It’s a weekly open play date held by the local mother’s club, and I was excited to finally go to one with her. I RSVPd on Facebook a week ago with excitement! I seriously love taking Tori to play with other kids, because she lights up around them.
My best friends also had planned to take their little ones, which I appreciated because I’m shy around new people.
My daughter woke at 7:30 this morning, just as I finished writing up my last report for work. PERFECT! That meant she would take her nap by 8:30, and be up by 9:30, giving us just enough time to get dressed and get out the door to make it right on time! We played for a bit, read some books, I nursed her and right on cue she started rubbing her tired eyes.
With a smile on my face for my perfect planning, I brought her to her room to lay her down. I kissed her, handed her her pacifier and waved as I closed the door, proud of myself to sticking to such a good schedule.
She didn’t make a peep! Wonderful! This was going just as I planned…
I began emailing the reports I had finished. I got about 10 minutes in, and that’s when I heard it.
“Maaaaaaama! Maaaaaaaaaama! Daaaaaadaaaaa!”
She was not sleeping. Not even laying down. I opened my baby monitor app and low and behold, my sweet angel baby wasn’t napping. Nope, she was preforming a concert for her stuffed animals in her room. She sang loud and proud, and bounced her knees as she smacked the side of her crib to keep the beat.
I waited. “She’ll go to sleep, just give her a few minutes,” I thought to myself.
Well, 30 minutes passed, and she was on her second set. It sounded like her teddy bears were demanding an encore, and she wasn’t going to disappoint.
She was happy, so I let her continue her merriment.
About 45 minutes into her performance, she took her final bow and laid down for her nap.
I looked at the clock… plans had been derailed. There was NO way that we were gonna be at the play date before 10:30, and at that point it was far more work to get there than it would be worth it.
I texted my girlfriends “why is it that every time I make plans my child refuses to take her nap?” This is universal code to our other mom friends for “hey… don’t kill me but we’re probably not going to make it.”
Within seconds I had two texts back saying the exact same things. No ones plans were going the way we had hoped.
#MOMLIFE… am I right? Why do we even bother trying sometimes?
It seemed that none of our babies wanted to nap, and wouldn’t be up in time for the play date. This didn’t stop me from having hope for a few minutes!
We even attempted a new plan to possibly go for a walk instead after the girls napped… key word POSSIBLY.
You guessed it… that didn’t happen either!
The planner in me wants to freak out when these things happen.
In my head my daughter and I were going to have a beautiful day. We were going to meet other moms, she was going to play with other babies, and we were all going to have so much fun.
I’ve grown used to plans changing quickly and abruptly over the last 9 months, and I’ve learned to embrace it. It is what it is.
Yes, it would have been lovely to get out of the house for an hour today and have some adult conversation. Yes, Victoria would have had a blast and probably taken a nice long nap for me this afternoon. Yes, time with my girlfriends would have been amazing.
It would have been great, but it’s ok that we couldn’t make it. There will be others.
I used to beat myself up when I’d make plans and they got all thrown off. Now I have been forced to learn to accept it and go with the flow.
No, my plan didn’t work out today.
Instead Victoria and I took the dog for an extra long walk on the farm after we fed our ducks. She and I sang and laughed the whole time. We ran into her aunt on our walk and she got to see her and smiled from ear to ear.
We laughed together as I showed her pictures of my grandmothers and asked her if she had met them in heaven (pretty sure she said yes). She learned how to say “Nana” and “Oma” (what HER two grandmothers go by). We danced to some music.
We smiled… a LOT!
Today didn’t go as planned, but it did turn out to be a pretty awesome day with my daughter. Just the two of us.
That’s what is important these days; not the plans I make and wish would work out. The important thing these days is making the most of the precious time I have with my little girl; soaking up every second of the days I get to spend with her, and giving her my full attention.
She’s not going to remember the group play date that mommy didn’t take her to when she was 9 months old. She WILL remember that I made her laugh, smile, and feel so loved. She will remember how often I just let her be herself and play, and sat back to watch her.
It does seem that every time I make a plan Tori throws it completely off, but that’s ok.
It’s totally fine, because it also seems that the days those plans go out the window are some of the most magical days we have together.
So mamas embrace those plans that went up in flames. Remember to just enjoy every moment we have with these precious gifts we call our children.
Every moment we get with them is a part of the greater plan, and that’s all that matters.